Why doesn’t he change? Why does she ask for my advice and not take it? Why can’t she see she is making the same mistake again? Why does he insist on being so mean?
Ever ponder these questions? Perhaps it’s time to step back and look at these situations in a different light. Take time to reflect by asking yourself: What am I learning from this experience? What area of my life does this situation highlight, and how can I address it? Is this a life lesson, and what should I do about it?
Realize that people choose their own path. While it may not be the path you would take, it’s the path they have chosen to take, so it is the right path for them. If someone is mean to you, realize it’s not about you (unless the individual is simply providing a verbal reflection of your own self-doubts or internal struggle). Listen to what your heart is telling you so you can learn from the experience. Accept the new knowledge you have gained and move on. We cannot change others or what they may think about us, only our reactions and the way we think about them.
The frustrating people with which you interact may just be the opportunity you need to learn acceptance, self-understanding and unconditional love.
What is the Right Path for You?
When you realize you’ve reached the pinnacle of success or a dead end and wonder what it is you should be doing next, look inward instead of outward and ask yourself: “What do I love to do?” Think about your day … when are you the happiest? The most motivated? The most satisfied? Be honest and realistic about the opportunity you are seeking. After all, it’s highly unlikely someone will pay you to lay on the couch, eat popcorn and watch movies all day. Besides, that would become pretty boring after awhile.
Once you figure out what “it” is, declare what you want to the universe by describing your specific desire aloud, and then watch for the signs, as these are the instructions you will need to make your dream happen. You may see advertisements pop up which suggest classes you could take, a passage from a story online may pop out at you, or you may get a call from a friend requesting your help. You may be asked to volunteer, which could place you in the right place at the right time for the opportunity you are seeking.
“Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. I’m convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work.” – Steve Jobs, Founder of Apple Computer.
You Were Placed on This Earth to Fulfill a Lifetime of Joy Not Sorrow
Does fear keep you from doing what you love to do or being who you want to be? Then find the things you truly love in what you are doing NOW and keep your focus on the prize. When people transition from this world, one of the first things they realize is the amount of time they’ve wasted worrying about things that didn’t happen. In the afterlife they realize: worrying is a waste of time, life is about unconditional love for everyone, and there is true joy in being free of pain/sorrow.
Ask yourself: “How does this worry benefit me?” Reposition the worry into something more positive such as: “This downtime or pattern of thought provides the perfect opportunity for me to gain perspective and insight so I can move forward.”
“Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.”
― Jim Morrison, The Doors
The key is not to allow fear to rule your life and decisions. Remember when you were in elementary school and worried about tests you had to take or whether other kids in the class liked you or not? Do the fear-based decisions you made then impact your life today? Probably not. While it’s healthy to analyze situations in order to proceed to the best possible outcome, realize too, that life is designed to throw you a curve ball every now and again so you can learn and grow.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. You’re playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
― Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”
Do you want to change careers or scarier still–start your own business–but you are afraid of taking the first step because of fear of failure? You are certainly not alone. Thankfully, there are a lot of methodologies out there to help you. Here’s a great article from Forbes magazine on ways to conquer the fear of failure: http://www.forbes.com/sites/glassheel/2013/04/23/5-ways-to-conquer-your-fear-of-failure/.
Oftentimes, it’s better to try and fail than not to try at all. Many great inventors realize this fact, take the time to learn from the mistakes then try again.
Thomas Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. Instead of viewing these experiments in light as failures, he told a reporter, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”
Take the time to look at situations from a different perspective–learn what you can–and see life’s little bumps in the road as a way to do it better the second time around.
If you are seeking perspective in your life, contact me for a private reading by filling out information on the contact page. I would love to hear from you!